Funny Traffic Laws in Tennessee

Mar 19

Don’t worry; we’re not picking on you Tennessee. Every state has ‘em. Those crazy out-of-date automobile laws that leave us scratching our heads and wondering, just when it was useful to allow people to hunt whales from their cars?

It is legal to gather and consume road kill.

That’s right. Legal. But isn’t that kind of like making it legal to buy dirt, you may ask? Well, it’s simply a matter of perspective. Where you might see a disgusting, fetid, flattened animal oozing on the road; I see an enticingly delicious piece of free beef jerky. So just in case you’re driving in Tennessee and you see that nice, tasty opossum cooking on the pavement, you’re legally good to go. Yum!

Driving is not allowed while asleep.

I’ve heard of sleep walking, but this is just plain ridiculous. I think that if you can actually get to your car, unlock it, start it up, and start driving on the street while snoozing, you not only SHOULDN’T get a traffic ticket, you deserve a medal in the narcoleptic Olympics! Is there really a person out there who can do this? Contact me. Maybe we can get you a spot on David Letterman’s “Stupid Human Tricks.”

No shooting any game from a moving automobile- except whales.

This is what happens when the court has their summer law clerks submit the finalized versions of laws. Judge to summer law clerk: “Did you pick up my dry cleaning, buy my wife our anniversary gift, get me coffee, and organize the files? Yes? Well, here’s the draft of our illegal hunting law. If you see anything that’s ‘off’ in it, fix it. Just don’t do anything that makes me look stupid, you idiot.” Summer law clerk: “Oh yes, your honor. Oh yes. Nothing to make you look stupid at all…” Who knows, though, maybe Tennessee once had an infestation of Killer Whales floundering on their roads?

No Parent can require their child to clean up trash from the highway on Easter Day

I guess on the other days of the year it is ok. You know times are tough when you see little road crews made up of toddlers. Maybe Tennessee parents used to combine the time-honored tradition of Easter Egg hunting with public service. “Sure honey; that broken bottle and that candy wrapper lying on the side of the road are exactly like Easter Eggs. Now be a dear and join the other children in the road crew while I go off to Sunday brunch.” See? This is just another example of the government interfering with an effective private social program. For shame!

In Fayette County you may not have more than five inoperable vehicles on your property.

It would seem that Fayette would want to set the vehicle limit a bit lower if they really wanted to stop people from having junky looking yards. As it stands, about the only thing that the law is preventing is independent junk yards from stetting up shop around the city.

In Lenoir City when you are waiting at a stop sign you must fire a gun to warn horse carriages that you are coming.

This may actually be a bit of a redundancy in Tennessee. Although admittedly a bit outdated, one has to wonder if this traffic law was even effective when it was written back in the day. I think the carriage drivers got the hint that a car was coming when their coach stopped moving and their horse smelled like gun powder.

In Nashville you cannot tie yourself to a vehicle and rollerblade down the highway.

I guess this might not be the best place to live out my fantasy of reenacting that classic scene from back to the future (although technically I guess Michael J. Fox was on a skateboard, and not really tied to it). In any case, Tennessee just made my top-ten list of places I need to visit if they actually had to make a law against anything this crazy!

 

In Memphis women can’t drive a car unless a man is in front of the car waving a red flag to warn other drivers

This is never enforced, but how awesome would it be if it was? crazy boyI mean, aside from all of the blatant misogyny and foolishness, every day would be like a parade!

That’s about it for wacky car laws in Tennessee, but don’t worry 49 other states, we’re getting to you!

Know of any insane auto laws in your state? Let us know by commenting below!

Oh, and for any of our Tennessee drivers who may have broken one or two of these or any other traffic laws, check out www.tennesseedriver.com if you need traffic school or defensive driving classes online!

3 comments

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  2. Reginald Nesslein /

    One of the many problems that some narcoleptics experience is cataplexy, a sudden muscular weakness brought on by strong emotions (though many people experience cataplexy without having an emotional trigger).^^`.

    Have a good week
    <http://www.livinghealthybulletin.com

  3. susancarol /

    Many problems are arises in funny traffic laws.Why because all the animals cross the road that time accident will occur. We have to think many solution and save people and save animals.

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